A day off

I was supposed to have a 2 year old today for a friend.... turns out she woke up not feeling well and didn't want to expose her to my little girl. I was relieved from that phone call. I wouldn't have minded at all, looking forward to it actually. But, I needed a day of rest.

I have'nt been feeling all that well lately, and to be honest, I just want the weekend to come, or next week a certain visitor to arrive and relieve my mind. I'm either pregnant or going crazy. (dont vote for the second). There is a good chance I am, but its still way early to know for sure. Unless I did a blood test, but those costs money. So I am playing the waiting game.

AFter having a miscarriage almost 2 months ago, it reallly hurts the thought of could be and then not being. I want another baby, I have such a desire to nurture and bring another baby into this world. I have a feeling with number two our family may be complete. Things are tight financially with my husband and I and I'm not sure a third baby would help that. Unless this baby is twins... then I have no choice than to have three! Listen to me, 'this baby' I'm not even sure I"m pregnant yet! What am I talking about.

My mom on the phone today said, "the fun is in the trying right?" you have to know my mom, that is way of her normal to say something like that. I was just taken back by it and sorta laughted a bit. I told Randy after we talked and he just laughed, and agreed with her.

Speaking of Randy, he is out working again tonight. I'm exhausted thinking about the hours he has been logging. Between the church and the second job cleaning I'm so in love with him even more! He is working so hard to provide for our family... to get us out of stinking comsumer debt. STuff we don't need, yet he is committed to get us out of debt. Hopefully by this time next year we will owe no money to credit cards and then we can focus on paying off my van and then our house!

Alright, I'm feeling sorta yucky tonight, like I could throw up and just not good. So I'm taking my dogs and going to bed. When Randy works late, I take them to the bedroom and they sleep on the bed till he comes home. Then they go to there corner. We have this nice entry way at our house thats off to the side of our front door and its perfect for the dogs! Its big enough for them both to spread out and sleep at night. IT is a great spot for them. We put a baby gate up and block them in there so Charlie doesn't go through the house and pee wherever he likes. (he does that sometimes)

Sophia has been in bed for over an hour now, so goodnight!